Grand Master (GM) - Holy MFT
The head hasher. The chairman of the board. The big cheese. The HMFIC. The guiding light. Gispert's legacy. The GM is not simply a figure head for the hash, rather he personifies the hash's character (or lack thereof.) He leads with a dynamic strength that permeates the fabric of the organization. Both directly, and through the hash officers, he gives inspiration, direction, and vision to all. This position ranks only below Beermeister, Religious Advisor, Hash Cash, Songmeister, Hash Flash, Haberdash and Webwanker in real importance to the hash.
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Religious Adviser - Sleazy Rider The RA is the arbiter of hash tradition and master of ceremonies at the on-in. When in the circle, the RA is always right, even when wrong. Other than presiding over the circle, the RA is responsible to ensure that deserving thirsts are quenched; they are fully responsible for the weather and the taste of the beer.
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Beermeister (BM) - Cheese Balls
This is unquestionably the most important position in the hash. The Beermeister has the weighty responsibility of making sure that the lifeblood of hashing is available at each and every hash event. He keeps constant vigilance to find the cheapest spirituous fermenti available. While this might be a "pain in the ass" job, it's undoubtedly the most important one to the hash.
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Hash Cash - Socradeez Nuts
The holder of the purse-strings. Someone needs to dash about the start of each hash begging for money. Someone has to keep track of what comes in and what goes out (commonly referred to as "the old in and out.") These generally unappreciated duties fall on the shoulders of the Hash Cash. This trustworthy soul must withstand the whining of the Hares, the whimpering of the hounds who are late or forgot their fees, and the interrogations of those who mistakenly think there should be some sort of accounting for hash funds.
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Hash Flash - (Position Open)
The person who captures on film for posterity all embarrassing hash moments. The hash flash must have an acute sense of the absurd to know what to take photos of, and also a small degree of reliability to bring a camera, take pictures, upload, and put only the finest thereof into the sacred photo album of the internet. Should be on at least speaking terms with the Webwanker.
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Haberdasher - (Position Open)
This is a person who has a flair for fashion, a head for business (who said head?), and the showmanship of P.T. Barnum.
She's responsible for the design, procurement, warehousing and selling as many as possible, items of apparel and various trinkets at the highest prices to the biggest suckers. |